Blackwater gets banned.
Right after we FINALLY decide to bring home 'some' troops.
So let me guess. We'll be having to send troops to do the job of that these private contractors were doing?
But wait!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/thenation/20070918/cm_thenation/15233815
"Who says? The occupying Americans. The Coalition Provisional Authority issued a "law" when they supposedly handed over sovereignty to Iraq--Order No. 17--that gave Blackwater and other US contractors immunity from Iraqi law. How clever of the American pro-consul."
So... if they are immune, how are they being prosecuted (those involved in the attack that started this scandal)?
This is a mess. Lets see what happens.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Wow to Torrents
So today I did a whole bunch of research on how to get the most out of my torrent downloads and I have to admit it was worth it. I learned to set up my Port Forwarding and my average download/upload speeds have increased tenfold. I'm stoked!
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
It Confounds Me
... how old fashioned people can be.
Seriously..
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSEIC47086020070904
An airline sacrifices two goats to please a sky god so that their air planes won't crash.
Ridiculous. How is this possible?
Seriously..
http://www.reuters.com/article/oddlyEnoughNews/idUSEIC47086020070904
An airline sacrifices two goats to please a sky god so that their air planes won't crash.
Ridiculous. How is this possible?
Friday, August 31, 2007
:-(
Just thought I'd share. There's one in particular that I was looking for from Time Magazine but couldn't find. I'll add it later if I do.
I should cite sources but I kind of saved these up over a period of about 8 months.... so shit. Please don't sue me.
I should cite sources but I kind of saved these up over a period of about 8 months.... so shit. Please don't sue me.
Monday, August 27, 2007
Arctic
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/business/4354036.stm
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/08/070823-arctic-oil.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Territorial_claims_in_the_Arctic
I saw some articles regarding this a few weeks ago. The articles mainly discussed which countries would have the most reasonable claims for the region (Canada, Russia, and Denmark). But as of today, after seeing the above articles, I'm starting to think that the issue is of much greater magnitude than I had previously fathomed.
First of all, I'd like to make a prominent exhibition of my disgust with the opportunistic nature of our worlds nations. Since I first became well aware of the issue of global warming I have always considered it a monumental issue. One not to be ignored. I have always been critical of the fact that our country has not done all it can to contribute to the solution (Including it's failure to agree to the Kyoto Protocol). As a result (and no, I'm not pinning the issue solely on the US) of the failure by our entire planet to prevent global warming from reaching such extremes, polar ice caps in the Arctic. Consequently, countries around the world are scrambling to find some sort of connection to the region so that they may lay claims to it and with it whatever natural resources may be found there.
Similar to the technique of licking or touching food I used a toddler to lay claims to the last cookie in the cookie jar or possibly the last slice of pizza, Russia has already sent a submarine to plant a capsule containing it's flag at the seabed of the North Pole. Most entertaining of all is the fact that Russia dumped tons of nuclear waste in the Arctic Ocean years ago. If they do end up annexing the region I hope they clean it up well. Denmark has taken no physical action to stake their claim but has vocalized it. Last, Canada is creating two new military bases in the Arctic to protect it's claims as well as budgeting Roughly 5.25 Canadian Dollars for eight icebreakers to map out the region.
One of the articles calls the Arctic the new Saudi Arabia. Let's hope not. If only so much effort were put forth to protect natural resources rather than for exploiting them, our world would be a far better place.
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/08/070823-arctic-oil.html
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Territorial_claims_in_the_Arctic
I saw some articles regarding this a few weeks ago. The articles mainly discussed which countries would have the most reasonable claims for the region (Canada, Russia, and Denmark). But as of today, after seeing the above articles, I'm starting to think that the issue is of much greater magnitude than I had previously fathomed.
First of all, I'd like to make a prominent exhibition of my disgust with the opportunistic nature of our worlds nations. Since I first became well aware of the issue of global warming I have always considered it a monumental issue. One not to be ignored. I have always been critical of the fact that our country has not done all it can to contribute to the solution (Including it's failure to agree to the Kyoto Protocol). As a result (and no, I'm not pinning the issue solely on the US) of the failure by our entire planet to prevent global warming from reaching such extremes, polar ice caps in the Arctic. Consequently, countries around the world are scrambling to find some sort of connection to the region so that they may lay claims to it and with it whatever natural resources may be found there.
Similar to the technique of licking or touching food I used a toddler to lay claims to the last cookie in the cookie jar or possibly the last slice of pizza, Russia has already sent a submarine to plant a capsule containing it's flag at the seabed of the North Pole. Most entertaining of all is the fact that Russia dumped tons of nuclear waste in the Arctic Ocean years ago. If they do end up annexing the region I hope they clean it up well. Denmark has taken no physical action to stake their claim but has vocalized it. Last, Canada is creating two new military bases in the Arctic to protect it's claims as well as budgeting Roughly 5.25 Canadian Dollars for eight icebreakers to map out the region.
One of the articles calls the Arctic the new Saudi Arabia. Let's hope not. If only so much effort were put forth to protect natural resources rather than for exploiting them, our world would be a far better place.
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Friday, August 24, 2007
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Fox Attacks Iran
http://foxattacks.com/iran
I'm getting CHILLS. Seriously.
On another note, it looks like Russia has already began it's age old practice of sending bomb carriers on long flight missions without any real target.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/6957589.stm
There's so much shit going on everywhere; it's making me pretty uneasy.
I'm getting CHILLS. Seriously.
On another note, it looks like Russia has already began it's age old practice of sending bomb carriers on long flight missions without any real target.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/6957589.stm
There's so much shit going on everywhere; it's making me pretty uneasy.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
Holy Shit
http://blog.wired.com/underwire/2007/08/were-one-step-c.html
Dude. Back when I was 15 I thought the idea up. But I never really thought it would be possible. Jeeeebuz. This is insane!
Dude. Back when I was 15 I thought the idea up. But I never really thought it would be possible. Jeeeebuz. This is insane!
Russia
http://www.guardian.co.uk/russia/article/0,,2153418,00.html
This doesn't look good at all. A few days ago I mentioned that Putin had released a statement saying that Russia did not see Iran as a threat. Again, we just added the IRGC to our terrorist list. Also, as is briefly mentioned in this article, Russia has been trying to dissuade the Czech Republic from agreeing to aid our administration by allowing us to 'build' part of our missile shield on their territory.
The main article is about how Russia intends to once again become one of the top producers of aircraft; mainly military aircraft.
"The Russian president, Vladimir Putin, announced ambitious plans today to revive Russia's military power and restore its role as the world's leading producer of military aircraft."
" "Russia wants balance. It wants a strategic balance with the US," Ivan Safranchuk, a Moscow-based defense analyst told the Guardian.
"Russia wants to do this as cheaply as possible. But with the Bush administration withdrawing from arms control treaties, Russia is saying it is also ready to keep the balance at a high level of cost," he said. "
Are you seeing how bad this is? Russia is effectively not sitting still while we come into their back yard and set up a missile shield. Remember the Bay of Pigs? What was our response to them back then? Yes I understand that a missile shield now and their nuclear silos back then aren't the same thing. But, what about our arming one of our allies (Israel) over the next ten years combined with the missile shield? Yes, I know back then we weren't 'friends' but who's to say that we are now? And if so, by the looks of it it doesn't look like we will be for long.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!
The only comforsting factor about this whole situation is this:
" "I do not exclude that a new administration in the United States will re-evaluate the current administration's decisions on missile defence," he said, after a meeting in Moscow with the Czech defence minister, Martin Bartak (Yuri Baluyevsky, Russia's military chief of staff). "
This doesn't look good at all. A few days ago I mentioned that Putin had released a statement saying that Russia did not see Iran as a threat. Again, we just added the IRGC to our terrorist list. Also, as is briefly mentioned in this article, Russia has been trying to dissuade the Czech Republic from agreeing to aid our administration by allowing us to 'build' part of our missile shield on their territory.
The main article is about how Russia intends to once again become one of the top producers of aircraft; mainly military aircraft.
"The Russian president, Vladimir Putin, announced ambitious plans today to revive Russia's military power and restore its role as the world's leading producer of military aircraft."
" "Russia wants balance. It wants a strategic balance with the US," Ivan Safranchuk, a Moscow-based defense analyst told the Guardian.
"Russia wants to do this as cheaply as possible. But with the Bush administration withdrawing from arms control treaties, Russia is saying it is also ready to keep the balance at a high level of cost," he said. "
Are you seeing how bad this is? Russia is effectively not sitting still while we come into their back yard and set up a missile shield. Remember the Bay of Pigs? What was our response to them back then? Yes I understand that a missile shield now and their nuclear silos back then aren't the same thing. But, what about our arming one of our allies (Israel) over the next ten years combined with the missile shield? Yes, I know back then we weren't 'friends' but who's to say that we are now? And if so, by the looks of it it doesn't look like we will be for long.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!
The only comforsting factor about this whole situation is this:
" "I do not exclude that a new administration in the United States will re-evaluate the current administration's decisions on missile defence," he said, after a meeting in Moscow with the Czech defence minister, Martin Bartak (Yuri Baluyevsky, Russia's military chief of staff). "
Blackout
Last night, or rather, this morning I had a dream about blacking out. Meaning, in my dream I had a party at my house there was a bunch of people and a bunch of alcohol. Everyone was having a great time, then all of a sudden I wake up (in the dream not in real life) and I can't remember the night before. My friends are all there and everyone is in their own hell recovering from their hangover. But somehow I get the feeling that I did something stupid the night before, that everyone know about it but just doesn't want to anything, and that it's pretty fucking hilarious. i never actually find out what it was that I did. It kind of freaks me out that I had this dream. Weird.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
!!!
http://rawstory.com/news/2007/Former_CIA_agent_US_to_attack_0821.html
Enough said. All that's left is for it to happen. I hope I'm wrong.
Enough said. All that's left is for it to happen. I hope I'm wrong.
Monday, August 20, 2007
FUCK
http://thinkprogress.org/2007/08/20/lieberman-syria-iraq/
Lieberman is talking about punking Syria. It's getting really hard to keep up with some of this shit. What next? What are we going to demand from Saudi Arabia?- it only makes sense to think they are next on the list.
The United States of America has become a bully. We are a super power and because of it feel like we can bully other smaller countries around with demands and threats of attacks if our demands aren't met. The entire world already sees us this way. It's only a matter of time before enough countries get fed up with our shit and take real action. September 11th was horrible. Imagine what will come next. I have a feeling it will be exponentially worse. Ron Paul half said it and didn't fully support his argument after Giuliani attacked him during a debate, but I will: we brought September 11th upon ourselves. If we stay on the track we are on we are going to bring something much worse upon ourselves. Lieberman needs to change his mindset because his actions and words are cause for some serious concern.
Lieberman is talking about punking Syria. It's getting really hard to keep up with some of this shit. What next? What are we going to demand from Saudi Arabia?- it only makes sense to think they are next on the list.
The United States of America has become a bully. We are a super power and because of it feel like we can bully other smaller countries around with demands and threats of attacks if our demands aren't met. The entire world already sees us this way. It's only a matter of time before enough countries get fed up with our shit and take real action. September 11th was horrible. Imagine what will come next. I have a feeling it will be exponentially worse. Ron Paul half said it and didn't fully support his argument after Giuliani attacked him during a debate, but I will: we brought September 11th upon ourselves. If we stay on the track we are on we are going to bring something much worse upon ourselves. Lieberman needs to change his mindset because his actions and words are cause for some serious concern.
Step 2
http://www.time.com/time/printout/0,8816,1654188,00.html
Read it.
So as you can see, if these reports are true, we will be adding Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corp (IRGC) to our terrorism list. The IRGC is the largest branch of Iran's military. Virtually, by adding the IRGC to our terrorism list we are adding Iran itself to the list. Reportedly, it is believed that the IRGC has been aiding Iraqi militants with bombs as well as with intelligence easing their ability to counter our troops.
Now the point I was getting to. The IRGC gave open support to Hezbolla (a radical Lebanese terrorist group) during their conflict with Israel. Israel is our ally, coincidentally one we just signed an agreement with to give 30 billion worth in military aid over the next ten years. Is this all making sense? Seriously, it irritates me and worries me to see that I may be correct about what I've been writing regarding the issue. We really are taking quick steps to place ourselves in a position to "rightfully" attack Iran, or if not that exactly, be there to support Israel when they do so. What's more, Bush doesn't have much time left and I don't think he can gamble on the fact that whoever takes the Presidency after him will follow through with what he begins. Therefore, I'm afraid that whatever shit goes down will be descending sometime soon. Hah. Unless there's a way for the election to be fixed so that an administration can be put in place to make sure whatever is started gets finished? But I'd rather think that isn't a possibility whatsoever.
Read it.
So as you can see, if these reports are true, we will be adding Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corp (IRGC) to our terrorism list. The IRGC is the largest branch of Iran's military. Virtually, by adding the IRGC to our terrorism list we are adding Iran itself to the list. Reportedly, it is believed that the IRGC has been aiding Iraqi militants with bombs as well as with intelligence easing their ability to counter our troops.
Now the point I was getting to. The IRGC gave open support to Hezbolla (a radical Lebanese terrorist group) during their conflict with Israel. Israel is our ally, coincidentally one we just signed an agreement with to give 30 billion worth in military aid over the next ten years. Is this all making sense? Seriously, it irritates me and worries me to see that I may be correct about what I've been writing regarding the issue. We really are taking quick steps to place ourselves in a position to "rightfully" attack Iran, or if not that exactly, be there to support Israel when they do so. What's more, Bush doesn't have much time left and I don't think he can gamble on the fact that whoever takes the Presidency after him will follow through with what he begins. Therefore, I'm afraid that whatever shit goes down will be descending sometime soon. Hah. Unless there's a way for the election to be fixed so that an administration can be put in place to make sure whatever is started gets finished? But I'd rather think that isn't a possibility whatsoever.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Well Well
I find it extremely entertaining that Animal Planet created a reality television show about a family of meerkats. Meerkat Manor. Haha. Seriously, can't they just produce more shows about vets and wild animals? Jeeeeeeez.
Besides that, I've decided that my life has to be a whole lot more adventurous. It has to start now. I'm sure when I'm older I'll be working more and have more responsibilities therefore I won't be able to take some of the risks required for some of these adventures.
First on the list: Skydiving.
I have to admit it's thanks to my friend Andre that I've decided to do so. He went for his 21st b day and took video of the experience. I saw the video of it and I must admit that it looks awesome.
I also have to fly a helicopter. This has always been a dream of mine. If it weren't so expensive I would get a commercial pilots license. Fortunately, I don't have to have a license to fly one, I can take a lesson with an instructor and fly the helicopter under his supervision.
Fly a glider plane. For this I believe I will actually get what is called a "rating." It's not exactly a license but it is what is required to fly solo or with passengers. I think the ladies would totally dig going flying with me. ;-)
Scuba dive. I use to want to be a marine biologist as a kid. It no longer appeals to me, but I definitely still want to learn to scuba dive. I've looked it up and it should run me down about $600.
Hang glide.I think this would just be cool. This is probably the most dangerous. Heh.
Go sailing. Just sounds interesting.
Go white water rafting and Kayaking. This should be pretty exciting.
For now that's where I will start. Hopefully I'll figure out some more stuff, after all that's a short list.
Besides that, I've decided that my life has to be a whole lot more adventurous. It has to start now. I'm sure when I'm older I'll be working more and have more responsibilities therefore I won't be able to take some of the risks required for some of these adventures.
First on the list: Skydiving.
I have to admit it's thanks to my friend Andre that I've decided to do so. He went for his 21st b day and took video of the experience. I saw the video of it and I must admit that it looks awesome.
I also have to fly a helicopter. This has always been a dream of mine. If it weren't so expensive I would get a commercial pilots license. Fortunately, I don't have to have a license to fly one, I can take a lesson with an instructor and fly the helicopter under his supervision.
Fly a glider plane. For this I believe I will actually get what is called a "rating." It's not exactly a license but it is what is required to fly solo or with passengers. I think the ladies would totally dig going flying with me. ;-)
Scuba dive. I use to want to be a marine biologist as a kid. It no longer appeals to me, but I definitely still want to learn to scuba dive. I've looked it up and it should run me down about $600.
Hang glide.I think this would just be cool. This is probably the most dangerous. Heh.
Go sailing. Just sounds interesting.
Go white water rafting and Kayaking. This should be pretty exciting.
For now that's where I will start. Hopefully I'll figure out some more stuff, after all that's a short list.
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Another Clue
http://en.rian.ru/russia/20070816/71949222.html
Above is the link to an article where Russia states that they do not see Iran as a threat. Two posts back i was bitching about how our Gov has signed a contract to give military aid to Israel. The military aid to Israel was part of a program our government has in action to create a "missile shield" in Europe as safety from certain rogue nations (mainly Iran) in the middle east. So how does this look? We say Iran is bad and we take action to empower Israel, who happens to be their main 'enemy.' On the other hand Russia says Iran isn't a threat, yet they aren't taking any action. Here's my point: if shit goes down the US will be looked at negatively simply because of the aid given to Israel (which has been going on for decades). We're not necessarily instigating but we're definitely providing some fuel for the flames to be fed if and (more likely) when a conflagration ignites.
Above is the link to an article where Russia states that they do not see Iran as a threat. Two posts back i was bitching about how our Gov has signed a contract to give military aid to Israel. The military aid to Israel was part of a program our government has in action to create a "missile shield" in Europe as safety from certain rogue nations (mainly Iran) in the middle east. So how does this look? We say Iran is bad and we take action to empower Israel, who happens to be their main 'enemy.' On the other hand Russia says Iran isn't a threat, yet they aren't taking any action. Here's my point: if shit goes down the US will be looked at negatively simply because of the aid given to Israel (which has been going on for decades). We're not necessarily instigating but we're definitely providing some fuel for the flames to be fed if and (more likely) when a conflagration ignites.
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Damn It.
Again, our government is pissing me off. I just read an article stating that our government has signed a deal with Israel to let them borrow 30 Billion US Dollars in military aid over the next 10 years. Roughly 75% of this aid has to be spent on Us arms deals. All in all we are making sure we get 22.5 Billion in business over the next 10 years in arms deals as well as arming one of our allies in the middle east.
God fucking damn it. Why can't we just mind our own fucking business..... seriously. 100% guaranteed there's a hidden agenda. It just pisses me off that our country is viewed in such a negative way by everyone else. This isn't going to help either.
God fucking damn it. Why can't we just mind our own fucking business..... seriously. 100% guaranteed there's a hidden agenda. It just pisses me off that our country is viewed in such a negative way by everyone else. This isn't going to help either.
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
What the French? Toast.
I was surfing through channels looking for something to watch when I saw a listing for Scrubs at 8:30 on the WGN channel. I went over to the channel to watch it and baseball was on. Fuck that shit pissed me off. It's not like we don't pay enough for fucking cable- they can't get the listings right?
Wednesday, August 1, 2007
New Job
Alright. So new news. Here goes. It's kind of crazy- but we shall see.
So I got a new job today. I found an ad on the paper that read as follows:
GENERAL OFFICE Act Now!
Hiring Today. No Exp. Req'd.
Will Train, Ear Up To $725 per
wk * * (951)273-____ * *
So I called. The receptionist told me about the company. It's called Safety Pro Inc. They make fire extinguishers, smoke alarms and this pretty nifty stuff called Dri-One which acts as a flame retardant (you apply it on paper, wood, or textiles and they won't ignite). After the run down on the company she told me there was an opening at 4:30 for an interview and asked if I could make it. I said yes, got ready and went over there. It's in Corona off Main. I got there on time and filled out an application while I waited for whoever it was that was interviewing me. After twenty minutes or so the President of the company came in and gave me my interview. After a series of questions about myself, my abilities and my experience he offered me a job as a manager. Apparently the company is expanding and they are opening 15-20 offices throughout the Inland Empire. I'll be going through the company's management training program and after what I'm guessing will be a month and a half or two I'll be opening my own office and will be in charge of 15 people. My salary will be $4,000 a month.
So all this sounds pretty exciting. I mean, I've never had a management position before and thus have no experience. But I'm confident that if the training the company provides is good enough I will learn everything I need to be successful in this position.
__________
This turned out to be a bust. I got ripped off for $160 bucks.
So I got a new job today. I found an ad on the paper that read as follows:
GENERAL OFFICE Act Now!
Hiring Today. No Exp. Req'd.
Will Train, Ear Up To $725 per
wk * * (951)273-____ * *
So I called. The receptionist told me about the company. It's called Safety Pro Inc. They make fire extinguishers, smoke alarms and this pretty nifty stuff called Dri-One which acts as a flame retardant (you apply it on paper, wood, or textiles and they won't ignite). After the run down on the company she told me there was an opening at 4:30 for an interview and asked if I could make it. I said yes, got ready and went over there. It's in Corona off Main. I got there on time and filled out an application while I waited for whoever it was that was interviewing me. After twenty minutes or so the President of the company came in and gave me my interview. After a series of questions about myself, my abilities and my experience he offered me a job as a manager. Apparently the company is expanding and they are opening 15-20 offices throughout the Inland Empire. I'll be going through the company's management training program and after what I'm guessing will be a month and a half or two I'll be opening my own office and will be in charge of 15 people. My salary will be $4,000 a month.
So all this sounds pretty exciting. I mean, I've never had a management position before and thus have no experience. But I'm confident that if the training the company provides is good enough I will learn everything I need to be successful in this position.
__________
This turned out to be a bust. I got ripped off for $160 bucks.
Tuesday, July 24, 2007
1 cm of your colon....
I was just watching The Daily Show With Jon Stewart and they had this super smart crazy astrophysicist name Neil DeGrasse Tyson on the show. He was talking about some crazy shit regarding the origin of life and his theory regarding it. But that wasn't as interesting and as DISTURBING as what what he said next.
"There is more bacteria living in one centimeter of your colon then there are, or ever have been, humans that have lived!"
- Neil DeGrasse Tyson
I moved around in my chair as I felt the awkward and unease from the statement. I looked it up. Apparently it is true. I figured I would share just so you, yes, you personally could share in my discomfort.
Cheers.
Rene R.
"There is more bacteria living in one centimeter of your colon then there are, or ever have been, humans that have lived!"
- Neil DeGrasse Tyson
I moved around in my chair as I felt the awkward and unease from the statement. I looked it up. Apparently it is true. I figured I would share just so you, yes, you personally could share in my discomfort.
Cheers.
Rene R.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Hollywood
So I was watching the news today- West Hollywood is trying to impeach President Bush. Hah! They won't get anywhere but at least it gave me a good laugh. Nice try!
This weekend was pretty decent. Got wasted here at home with the Fam. My niece enjoyed her B Day. Good food and got to see a lot of people that it's been too long since I saw.
Everything is falling back into place. Order is returning. I'll be out in Corona tomorrow. Real Estate classes too be done soon. I should have my license within a month and a half. here we go!
ALSO. I had popcorn earlier and decided that it's kind of a weird word. Yeah. POPCORN. Better yet, in Spanish popcorn is called "palomitas" which literally translated refers to "mini doves." That's even weirder. I love my native tongue.
____________
PS: Oh, this badass below caught my attention with this quote. Cheers!
“Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength.”
- August Wilson
This weekend was pretty decent. Got wasted here at home with the Fam. My niece enjoyed her B Day. Good food and got to see a lot of people that it's been too long since I saw.
Everything is falling back into place. Order is returning. I'll be out in Corona tomorrow. Real Estate classes too be done soon. I should have my license within a month and a half. here we go!
ALSO. I had popcorn earlier and decided that it's kind of a weird word. Yeah. POPCORN. Better yet, in Spanish popcorn is called "palomitas" which literally translated refers to "mini doves." That's even weirder. I love my native tongue.
____________
PS: Oh, this badass below caught my attention with this quote. Cheers!
“Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing. Use the pain as fuel, as a reminder of your strength.”
- August Wilson
Friday, July 6, 2007
Apologies
Need something to think about?
Take this. When someone does something that makes you upset and you feel that it was something they could have avoided, what is it that you expect out of that person, that is of course, other than, if possible, their undoing what it was they did in the first place to make you upset? Apologize right? Right. Well what is an apology? Rather, what is the nature of an apology?
Here's how i see it: an apology is the announcement/acknowledgment of regret felt for an action (or lack of) resulting in an inconvenience to another individual (and I say individual rather than person because I apologized to my dog earlier today for stepping on his paw). Example. You're late to pick someone up from the airport. That person is inconvenienced because he/she not only is jet lagged and carrying 40lbs of luggage (70lbs if that person is a she) but also has to wait in an environment filled with people in a great hurry and in bad moods for similar reasons. Well then, you feel horrible for putting this person through said situation. You feel regret and experience guilt. You apologize therefore acknowledging these emotions. This person, although not fully, feels a tiny bit better and to a certain extent forgives you (but probably doesn't forget).
How can someone's guilt make someone else feel better?
In the end their pain and suffering weren't wiped away....
Take this. When someone does something that makes you upset and you feel that it was something they could have avoided, what is it that you expect out of that person, that is of course, other than, if possible, their undoing what it was they did in the first place to make you upset? Apologize right? Right. Well what is an apology? Rather, what is the nature of an apology?
Here's how i see it: an apology is the announcement/acknowledgment of regret felt for an action (or lack of) resulting in an inconvenience to another individual (and I say individual rather than person because I apologized to my dog earlier today for stepping on his paw). Example. You're late to pick someone up from the airport. That person is inconvenienced because he/she not only is jet lagged and carrying 40lbs of luggage (70lbs if that person is a she) but also has to wait in an environment filled with people in a great hurry and in bad moods for similar reasons. Well then, you feel horrible for putting this person through said situation. You feel regret and experience guilt. You apologize therefore acknowledging these emotions. This person, although not fully, feels a tiny bit better and to a certain extent forgives you (but probably doesn't forget).
How can someone's guilt make someone else feel better?
In the end their pain and suffering weren't wiped away....
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Heart Attacks and Flies
I'm supposed to be working right now but I've decided to take a quick break. One of the quirks of being self employed is that I can take breaks for as long as I want, as often as I want and whenever I want. But then again, it's my wallet that hurts from too frequent or too long breaks.
I just got off the phone with a potential client. I spent almost an hour explaining menial details over -and over -and over- and over again. I had been in my garage working out when my cell phone rang. It was him calling to discuss the loan I had proposed to him. I ran inside and just as i picked up I saw that the battery was dying on my phone so I ran to the charger and plugged it in. For the next hour or so I sat on the phone with this guy, sweaty as a motherf*ck*r from just having been working out, being attacked by flies. YeS! Flies. I left the garage door open and the door to the garage open. Flies swarmed in. It was like one of the signs of the apocalypse. I'm kidding of course. There were only a few. But they were impossible to kill. Especially since I was on the phone and trying to pay attention to the conversation. The worse part was that I couldn't get away from them because my cell was plugged in. It was horrible. Just the feeling of them landing on me. It grossed me out so bad. I hate flies. I almost want to write to congress to see if we can figure out a way to kill them all...
Oh yeah... almost forgot. Who's idea was it to make the term "heart attack" more commonly used than "cardiac arrest?" Seriously. I remember that as a kid I use to think of heart attacks as either your heart attacking something or something attacking your heart. Yeah. Maybe your lungs had a grudge on your heart? Maybe your heart had beef with your stomach? Who knows... I was a weird kid.
Sunday, June 24, 2007
D N
Today was somewhat interesting. I stayed home, as has become my custom on Sundays for the past month, and 'chilled.' It wasn't bad at all, in fact, I discovered Death Note. It's Japanese anime. It's about this guy named Light (apparently in Japan it's not weird name you kid light..) who finds a black notebook outside his school. It turns out this notebook is a 'Death Note.' Basically, it works this way: Forty seconds after a name is written inside the notebook that person dies. It's pretty simple. You can also write out in detail exactly how that person dies if you so choose, but thats beside the point. Anyways, this kid Light. After finding the book and reading it's instructions he thinks it's a joke but ends up taking it home with him anyways. Eventually he tries it out just for 'shit's and giggles' and finds out that it works. He then decides that he is going to do the world a favor and purge it of all evil by systematically killing off all high profile criminals by writing their name in the notebook. He believes he's bringing about justice and feels that if he keeps it up people around the world will realize that all criminals are dying off and choose not to commit any crimes out of fear of dying.
All in all the story is pretty entertaining. But it got me thinking. The death penalty. It's kind of the same concept with the exception that this character Light has taken it upon himself to judge and execute criminals. It's a huge moral issue. I'm supportive of the death penalty, but like most people, have my own guidelines as to what crimes merit death. But I won't go into detail. To sum it up, if someone kills someone else knowingly and purposefully and not in self defense or in defense of someone else, they deserve to die. I see them as threats to society. I don't believe any amount jail time would certify 100% the 'correction' of their behavior, and in fact, think they would be prone to commit the same crime again where they allowed to return to society.
It's just my opinion. Don't hate me for it.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Over It
Alright. I'm pretty much over everything that was on my mind last night. I've decided that things could be much worse. I'm going to concentrate on working hard towards what I have to do to better my situation instead of bitch about said situation. So yeah- you won't have to hear about it.
_______
Today I picked up my guitar for the first time in a while. After messing with it for about an hour it became pretty damn clear that I've forgotten most of the songs I use to know. Which irritated me quite a bit. I should have never stopped playing it. So, I've decided to start practicing again. It's not like I have to learn to play all over again. I simply need to re learn some chords, build some strength in my left hand and dexterity in my right. Oh, yeah, and learn more songs.
Also, I cooked up a nice new resume today. I'm going to copy/paste in onto here for your reading pleasure. Any feedback is appreciated. Enjoy!
____________________________________________________
| Rene Ruiz 29090 Sal Rio Dr. Menifee, California 92584 (951)317-**** ReneRuizJ@gmail.com | Summary I am and extremely self sufficient and self motivated individual. Always looking for new challenges and always overcoming them. I take pride in considering myself a well spoken character; in English and Spanish, for both are my native languages. I can speak, read and write both equally well. My main priority at the moment is to obtain my college degree. It is therefore critical that I find a employer who is willing and able to have some flexibility in regards to my schedule. In exchange I offer the full array of my abilities, knowledge and experience as well as my commitment towards excellence. Work Experience |
Loan Officer 2/2007 - Present Axis One Financial, Carpinteria, CA § My responsibilities as a loan officer with Axis One Financial were virtually identical as to my responsibilities with Americas Mortgage Specialists, with the exception that with Axis One Financial I worked independently from home. This opportunity greatly helped me develop my personal organizational skills. My responsibilities included meeting with applicants to obtain information for loan applications and to answer questions about the process. Explaining to customers the different types of loans and credit options that are available, as well as the terms of those services. Obtaining and compiling copies of loan applicants' credit histories, corporate financial statements, and other financial information. Reviewing and updating credit and loan files. Reviewing loan agreements to ensure that they are complete and accurate according to policy. Computing payment schedules. Staying abreast of new types of loans and other financial services and products in order to better meet customers' needs. Collaborating with underwriters to aid in resolving mortgage application problems. Analyzing potential loan markets and developing referral networks in order to locate prospects for loans. | |
Loan Officer 7/2006 - 2/2007 America's Mortgage Specialist, Corona, CA § Entering this industry was extremely difficult but also equally rewarding. My responsibilities included meeting with applicants to obtain information for loan applications and to answer questions about the process. Explain to customers the different types of loans and credit options that are available, as well as the terms of those services. Obtaining and compiling copies of loan applicants' credit histories, financial statements, and other financial information. Reviewing and updating credit and loan files. Reviewing loan agreements to ensure that they are complete and accurate according to policy. Computing payment schedules. Staying abreast of new types of loans and other financial services and products in order to better meet customers' needs. Collaborate with underwriters to aid in resolving mortgage application problems. Analyzing potential loan markets and developing referral networks in order to locate prospects for loans. | |
File Clerk 9/2005 - 7/2006 Barbaro & Valentine, Santa Ana, Ca § As a file clerk with Barbaro & Valentine my job duties included adding new material to file records, and creating new records as necessary. Answering questions about records and files. Assigning and recording or stamping identification numbers or codes in order to index materials for filing. Eliminating outdated or unnecessary materials as well as destroying them or transferring them to inactive storage according to file maintenance guidelines and legal requirements. Finding and retrieving information from files in response to requests from authorized users. Modifying and improving filing systems, or implementing new filing systems. Performing periodic inspections of materials or files in order to ensure correct placement, legibility, and proper condition. Placing materials into storage receptacles, such as file cabinets, boxes, bins, or drawers, according to classification and identification information. Scanning or reading incoming materials in order to determine how and where they should be classified or filed. Sorting or classifying information according to guidelines such as content, purpose, user criteria, chronological, alphabetical, or numerical order. Track materials removed from files in order to ensure that borrowed files are returned. Designing forms related to filing systems. Gathering materials to be filed from departments and employees. Perform general office duties such as typing, operating office machines, and sorting mail. | |
Cashier 3/2003 - 7/2006 Stater Bros, Corona, Ca § My main responsibility was to provide excellent customer service while ringing up orders. Other responsibilities included stocking shelves as well as organizing and maintaining products in storage. Working here has helped considerably in learning to help customers with questions and requests while at the same time being able to keep up with all of my other responsibilities. | |
Customer Service Representative 6/2002 - 3/2003 Pizza Hut , Corona, Ca § Responsible for taking orders on the telephone and in person as well as preparing orders. Helping customers with any questions as well as providing information regarding our products and services. | |
Education | |
| 8/2004 - 8/2008 Cal State Fullerton, Fullerton, Ca § Some College Coursework Completed § Double major : Criminal Justice and Public Administration. § High School Diploma from Corona High School | |
| |
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
The Letter E
Everything is a fucking mess. I don't feel like writing about it.
On a brighter note, I just woke up because I fell off my bed, and bare with me- I'm just getting to the good part, I fell off my bed while asleep because I was having a dream about having a threesome with Megan Fox and Tara Reid. Are you laughing yet? Good. And yes- in the dream they both fell off the bed with me. They didn't have a choice. We were very much intertwined. Heh.
So yeah, now that I'm back to thinking about how shitty my life is right now. . . I REALLY could go for a beer right now. But I'd rather not drink alone.
- - - - -
Ready yourselves. I have a feeling the next post is going to be long, elaborate and boring with great details about everything I'm purposefully neglecting to write about right now.
Cheers.
PS. Anyone still act like a child and have cereal for breakfast most mornings? (and by morning I mean anywhere from 6am till 2pm) I do. Anyone notice the fact that Trix no longer shapes its cereal? They made it all spherical. Seriously. WTF happened?
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Safari
Downloaded Safari 3 Beta. They added tabs. PERFECT!
I feel lame posting something like this which lacks- erm, substance? Yeah.
So here's a nice riddle. I'll post the answer with my next post. Or if it you can't wait then just hit me up and I'll give you the answer. BTW the answer is pretty simple. I really am hoping people hit me up for the answer so I can laugh at them... jk.
It is the beginning of eternity, the end of time, the beginning of end, and the end of every space.
What is it?
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Relationships
"Relationships don't work the way they do on television and in the movies.
Will they?
Won't they?
And then they finally do and then they're happy forever.
Give me a break.
Nine out of ten of them end because they weren't right for each other to begin with and half of the ones that get married get divorced anyway. And I'm telling you, right now, through all of this stuff, I have not become a cynic. I haven't.
Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and, you know, in some cultures a chicken. You can call me a sucker; i don't care. Cuz I do... believe in it. Bottom line is.. couples that are truly right for each other wade through the same crap as everybody else. But the big difference is they don't let it take 'em down. One of those two people will stand up and fight for that relationship every time- if it's right and they're REAL lucky."
Bravo. Well spoken. This is a quote by, believe it or not, Dr. Cox from Scrubs. Yeah. I know. How fucking lame. But hear me out.
Recently I've become a fan of Scrubs. I've been downloading episodes and watching them. When I came across this episode and heard the above quote in it I immediately paused it, hit rewind and opened up Word so that I could type it out. Why? Well I happen to agree with almost every word of it. Let me put it in context for you...
The first few lines are self explanatory. Obviously, and I truly hope there is no one out there disagreeing, relationships are NOT like on television and in movies.
Next, divorce rates ARE ridiculously high. Properly calculated, divorce statistics are not exactly at 50%. They are at a miniscule 41%. Yes I was being sarcastic. 41% is still way too fucking much. Seriously. Check it out for yourself: http://www.divorcereform.org/nyt05.html
Now, the candies and the chicken... well I don't know if this line lost a lot of you, but I knew exactly what it meant as soon as he said it. He's referring to those thing that in a relationship, in accordance to the nature of that relationship, are the responsibilities of each person in the relationship. If I lost you just go back and re read it. In a marriage where the man works and the wife raises the children- the man better god damn work hard enough to sustain the family and the wife better god damn raise the children well. They should both also cater to each others needs. If the man comes home from a long day at work and wants some ass, honestly don't think of me as a pig just yet, I think the wife should be there to cater to that need and maybe have dinner ready too. BUT- if the husband comes home from a long fucking day at work and finds his wife exhausted from a long day of cooking and cleaning he should be ready to cater to her needs. Offer to watch the kids the rest of the evening or hell, call a babysitterfor the kids and take the wife out to dinner. Buy her a nice gift. I dunno.. it's easier to explain the expectancies I will have of my wife than those she will have of me (that's because I haven't met her yet). But I hope when the day comes we're both good at communicating our needs to each other. My point is- both husband and wife have to do their part and be attentive to each others needs. (Also, this was an example. I understand that the nature of one relationship compared to the next will always differ, but this was the most obvious and easiest example to use.)
Alright. This entry is getting way too long and I got a bit carried away with that last paragraph, so I'll be brief with the rest. Now what I described above sounded more like a contract between two people. And it is. Really. But for this contract to work there is one more element which must not go missing. Love. Yes I too believe in it. I believe that the day when I find a woman and can tell her everything about myself; all the good and especially the bad, and she can still want to be with me, and visa versa of course, then I will have truly found love. If your REAL lucky and you've found that person and you both willingly follow through with your responsibilities in accordance to the nature of your relationship then when disagreements come up you'll both be in a position to make things work. Because no matter how intense the disagreement may be, one of the two, if not both, will always find a way to agree.
ReneRuizJ
Will they?
Won't they?
And then they finally do and then they're happy forever.
Give me a break.
Nine out of ten of them end because they weren't right for each other to begin with and half of the ones that get married get divorced anyway. And I'm telling you, right now, through all of this stuff, I have not become a cynic. I haven't.
Yes, I do happen to believe that love is mainly about pushing chocolate covered candies and, you know, in some cultures a chicken. You can call me a sucker; i don't care. Cuz I do... believe in it. Bottom line is.. couples that are truly right for each other wade through the same crap as everybody else. But the big difference is they don't let it take 'em down. One of those two people will stand up and fight for that relationship every time- if it's right and they're REAL lucky."
Bravo. Well spoken. This is a quote by, believe it or not, Dr. Cox from Scrubs. Yeah. I know. How fucking lame. But hear me out.
Recently I've become a fan of Scrubs. I've been downloading episodes and watching them. When I came across this episode and heard the above quote in it I immediately paused it, hit rewind and opened up Word so that I could type it out. Why? Well I happen to agree with almost every word of it. Let me put it in context for you...
The first few lines are self explanatory. Obviously, and I truly hope there is no one out there disagreeing, relationships are NOT like on television and in movies.
Next, divorce rates ARE ridiculously high. Properly calculated, divorce statistics are not exactly at 50%. They are at a miniscule 41%. Yes I was being sarcastic. 41% is still way too fucking much. Seriously. Check it out for yourself: http://www.divorcereform.org/nyt05.html
Now, the candies and the chicken... well I don't know if this line lost a lot of you, but I knew exactly what it meant as soon as he said it. He's referring to those thing that in a relationship, in accordance to the nature of that relationship, are the responsibilities of each person in the relationship. If I lost you just go back and re read it. In a marriage where the man works and the wife raises the children- the man better god damn work hard enough to sustain the family and the wife better god damn raise the children well. They should both also cater to each others needs. If the man comes home from a long day at work and wants some ass, honestly don't think of me as a pig just yet, I think the wife should be there to cater to that need and maybe have dinner ready too. BUT- if the husband comes home from a long fucking day at work and finds his wife exhausted from a long day of cooking and cleaning he should be ready to cater to her needs. Offer to watch the kids the rest of the evening or hell, call a babysitterfor the kids and take the wife out to dinner. Buy her a nice gift. I dunno.. it's easier to explain the expectancies I will have of my wife than those she will have of me (that's because I haven't met her yet). But I hope when the day comes we're both good at communicating our needs to each other. My point is- both husband and wife have to do their part and be attentive to each others needs. (Also, this was an example. I understand that the nature of one relationship compared to the next will always differ, but this was the most obvious and easiest example to use.)
Alright. This entry is getting way too long and I got a bit carried away with that last paragraph, so I'll be brief with the rest. Now what I described above sounded more like a contract between two people. And it is. Really. But for this contract to work there is one more element which must not go missing. Love. Yes I too believe in it. I believe that the day when I find a woman and can tell her everything about myself; all the good and especially the bad, and she can still want to be with me, and visa versa of course, then I will have truly found love. If your REAL lucky and you've found that person and you both willingly follow through with your responsibilities in accordance to the nature of your relationship then when disagreements come up you'll both be in a position to make things work. Because no matter how intense the disagreement may be, one of the two, if not both, will always find a way to agree.
ReneRuizJ
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Confidence
Dictionary.com defines confidence as freedom from doubt (or) belief in yourself and your abilities.
How important is confidence?
To me it is extremely important. I'm not very susceptible to peer pressure and not very interested in what others think about me. Therefore, the main drive behind my achievements is my own opinion: what I think about myself, of what I do, of where I am and of where I am going. Without confidence in what I'm capable of there is no future for me. Maybe I'm just rambling on about something everyone else already knows or has thought about... regardless, after the last entry discouraging "hope" and "beliefs" I feel I should clear some of it up.
What I am trying to say is that my mom wasn't completely lying to me when she said that all I had to do to achieve something was to believe; she was merely not specific enough. She didn't differentiate between simply "believing" and believing in one's own abilities. To achieve a dream one must keep that dream within the limits of what one's abilities are capable of achieving and then have full confidence in one's own abilities, patience, hard work and diligence to finally reach out and alter that dream into an actualization. Without the confidence to drive us to fight for an ambition one can not expect a fruitful result.
I have to give credit to my aunt for a conversation we had today that led me to this apprehension. Thank you...
July 2006
_______
***Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
How important is confidence?
To me it is extremely important. I'm not very susceptible to peer pressure and not very interested in what others think about me. Therefore, the main drive behind my achievements is my own opinion: what I think about myself, of what I do, of where I am and of where I am going. Without confidence in what I'm capable of there is no future for me. Maybe I'm just rambling on about something everyone else already knows or has thought about... regardless, after the last entry discouraging "hope" and "beliefs" I feel I should clear some of it up.
What I am trying to say is that my mom wasn't completely lying to me when she said that all I had to do to achieve something was to believe; she was merely not specific enough. She didn't differentiate between simply "believing" and believing in one's own abilities. To achieve a dream one must keep that dream within the limits of what one's abilities are capable of achieving and then have full confidence in one's own abilities, patience, hard work and diligence to finally reach out and alter that dream into an actualization. Without the confidence to drive us to fight for an ambition one can not expect a fruitful result.
I have to give credit to my aunt for a conversation we had today that led me to this apprehension. Thank you...
July 2006
_______
***Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Monday, June 11, 2007
Skepticism
When I was eight years old I jumped off the second story patio of my grandmother's house because I believed I could fly. I know. How could I have really thought I could fly?
From when I was six until I was eleven I often spent my entire summers at my grandmothers house. This summer was no different. On this particular day there was nothing to do. There was nothing on television and no one around to play with. My grandmother was busy cooking lunch. It was then that my uncle and my cousin Alberto, came to visit. I was excited to have someone to play with. After my cousin had said hello to my grandmother we quickly ran upstairs to the second story patio. This general 'area' was were we often played power rangers, ninja turtles, etc. This is the spot I would later jump from.
I had been brought up thinking that I could do anything or achieve anything if I REALLY believed in it. This, combined with the dream (one we have all had, I am sure) of flying, led me to eventually try to fly. I don't recall whether I had premeditated to do so or simply came up with the idea on the spot, but I informed my cousin that I was going to fly. My plan was simple. I was going to jump off and then ... Well, float off? Slowly descend without injuring myself? Take off like Superman? Well I didn't have all the details planned out, but the base of the plan was to fly. So I jumped off and as I was in midair I really thought I was doing it. I really thought I was flying. For the 2 or 3 seconds it took me to "land" I really thought I was flying. Picture me jumping off and as I fall a smile widens across my face as I believed I was flying. Before jumping off I convinced myself of what I had been told about believing and that to fly all I had to do was believe I could do it, and I promise you, I was not one bit afraid; I really did believe...
But believing was not enough. What I had been taught wasn't true. I couldn't do it... I didn't fly, instead I broke my leg.
I was so ashamed about having been so naive that I told everyone my cousin had dared me to jump off and so I had done it. I didn't care if they thought I was stupid for jumping off on a dare... I just didn't want them to know that I had been even stupider in believing I could fly. He was fine with that. He turned out looking like the intelligent one; the one making the dare and not the one jumping off and breaking his leg.
I've been thinking back on this experience a lot lately. I've decided that this was the exact point when I began to question anything and everything I am told. I'm skeptical because when I was eight years old I though that if I truly believed I could fly I would be able to do so.... Then I tried it and it didn't happen. I also think that deep down, subconsciously, I hold a grudge against my mother for this because she was the main person instigating in my mind that I could do anything as long as I believed in it. I don't regret it though. I learned that hope isn't enough and to make dreams come true it also takes patience, hard work and diligence. I also believe that this further developed skepticism is what eventually led me to abandon my Catholic faith and become agnostic.
June 28 2006
__________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
From when I was six until I was eleven I often spent my entire summers at my grandmothers house. This summer was no different. On this particular day there was nothing to do. There was nothing on television and no one around to play with. My grandmother was busy cooking lunch. It was then that my uncle and my cousin Alberto, came to visit. I was excited to have someone to play with. After my cousin had said hello to my grandmother we quickly ran upstairs to the second story patio. This general 'area' was were we often played power rangers, ninja turtles, etc. This is the spot I would later jump from.
I had been brought up thinking that I could do anything or achieve anything if I REALLY believed in it. This, combined with the dream (one we have all had, I am sure) of flying, led me to eventually try to fly. I don't recall whether I had premeditated to do so or simply came up with the idea on the spot, but I informed my cousin that I was going to fly. My plan was simple. I was going to jump off and then ... Well, float off? Slowly descend without injuring myself? Take off like Superman? Well I didn't have all the details planned out, but the base of the plan was to fly. So I jumped off and as I was in midair I really thought I was doing it. I really thought I was flying. For the 2 or 3 seconds it took me to "land" I really thought I was flying. Picture me jumping off and as I fall a smile widens across my face as I believed I was flying. Before jumping off I convinced myself of what I had been told about believing and that to fly all I had to do was believe I could do it, and I promise you, I was not one bit afraid; I really did believe...
But believing was not enough. What I had been taught wasn't true. I couldn't do it... I didn't fly, instead I broke my leg.
I was so ashamed about having been so naive that I told everyone my cousin had dared me to jump off and so I had done it. I didn't care if they thought I was stupid for jumping off on a dare... I just didn't want them to know that I had been even stupider in believing I could fly. He was fine with that. He turned out looking like the intelligent one; the one making the dare and not the one jumping off and breaking his leg.
I've been thinking back on this experience a lot lately. I've decided that this was the exact point when I began to question anything and everything I am told. I'm skeptical because when I was eight years old I though that if I truly believed I could fly I would be able to do so.... Then I tried it and it didn't happen. I also think that deep down, subconsciously, I hold a grudge against my mother for this because she was the main person instigating in my mind that I could do anything as long as I believed in it. I don't regret it though. I learned that hope isn't enough and to make dreams come true it also takes patience, hard work and diligence. I also believe that this further developed skepticism is what eventually led me to abandon my Catholic faith and become agnostic.
June 28 2006
__________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Mary Jones
Mary Jones
Female.
Age 71
*Not homeless. A friend of Mike Nevon. Retired.
“A mother should never have to burry her own children.”
Mary was sixteen when she dropped out of high school; she was pregnant and her boyfriend would not let her achieve a higher education than himself. They were married twenty one years. In 1971, after trying to divorce four times, they finally separated for good. From then on Mary raised the six children they had had all on her own (they had seven but one passed away at the age of seven months; she didn’t say why). Mary worked at a company who manufactured slurpee machines for several years and sometime in the late 70’s applied at Hue’s Aircrafts, where after lying on her application, she was hired as a quality control specialist. Her first days on the job were frustrating. She had no clue what she was doing. With time she learned and moved up the company ladder. In 1995 she was laid off. She inspected programmed and designed circuit boards and hardware used in airplanes operated by out military. She never got her high school diploma.
Mary gave birth to 7 children of which only 4 are still alive to this day. Her oldest, Patty, was the only one of her children who suffered no addictions and actually made something of herself. She is now 54, is married, runs a daycare center and takes care of her deceased brother and sister’s children. Her second oldest, Roy, was a heroin addict as well as an alcoholic. After being diagnosed with Hepatitis C Roy began to pick up his act. He is now a devout Christian and is stabilizing his life. Charlie, age 50, was also a heroin addict and alcoholic until the death of his best friend in a motorcycle accident which he was also involved in wherein his back was broken in two places. He has now begun to get his act together and is now married. Her next two children Warren (would be 45) and Trixie (would be 42) are now deceased. Warren was a heavy drinker, his favorite drink being Thunderbird Wine. He drank so much of it his liver disintegrated. He died because of undetected internal bleeding. Trixie passed due to a Heroine overdose. She was an active prostitute here in Corona. She sold herself in order to feed her addiction. Her last child (other than the 7 month old deceased whose name was undisclosed) is named Paul. He is now in jail because having been on a heroine trip he brutally beat his mother, Mary, and put her in the hospital. When he was arrested he told police that he was God and his mother was Satan and that was the reason why he had beat her. Five months later she suffered a stroke followed by another 8 months later. It was calculated that she had only months to live; her children took everything she had and divided it amongst themselves. She did not pass away and is now recuperating from her loss.
Mary use to live in Garden Grove. As has become quite evident, nearly all her children had addictions which degraded her home. They pillaged through her savings and possessions in order to fuel their addictions. In 1996 after her having been laid off she left them and moved to Corona. She now lives in a modest home near Centennial High School.
Mary is highly motivated and politically active. She corresponds with our senators on a regular basis. She has in the past also sent letters to ex President Clinton, Colin Powell, and Barbara Feinstein. She reads the newspaper every day to maintain herself well informed.
Mary is also a devout Christian and thanks “the Lord” for every opportunity she has been given in life. She resents none of her children nor her ex husband regardless of their past. She prays for them every night and says she still “loves them.”
I got the impression from Mary that she doesn’t often have someone who is willing to listen and absorb some of her wisdom. I was deeply touched by her story and inspired by her truly benevolent and forgiving attitude as well as her strength through all of her endeavors. I was thoroughly impressed.
Nov 11 2005
-________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Female.
Age 71
*Not homeless. A friend of Mike Nevon. Retired.
“A mother should never have to burry her own children.”
Mary was sixteen when she dropped out of high school; she was pregnant and her boyfriend would not let her achieve a higher education than himself. They were married twenty one years. In 1971, after trying to divorce four times, they finally separated for good. From then on Mary raised the six children they had had all on her own (they had seven but one passed away at the age of seven months; she didn’t say why). Mary worked at a company who manufactured slurpee machines for several years and sometime in the late 70’s applied at Hue’s Aircrafts, where after lying on her application, she was hired as a quality control specialist. Her first days on the job were frustrating. She had no clue what she was doing. With time she learned and moved up the company ladder. In 1995 she was laid off. She inspected programmed and designed circuit boards and hardware used in airplanes operated by out military. She never got her high school diploma.
Mary gave birth to 7 children of which only 4 are still alive to this day. Her oldest, Patty, was the only one of her children who suffered no addictions and actually made something of herself. She is now 54, is married, runs a daycare center and takes care of her deceased brother and sister’s children. Her second oldest, Roy, was a heroin addict as well as an alcoholic. After being diagnosed with Hepatitis C Roy began to pick up his act. He is now a devout Christian and is stabilizing his life. Charlie, age 50, was also a heroin addict and alcoholic until the death of his best friend in a motorcycle accident which he was also involved in wherein his back was broken in two places. He has now begun to get his act together and is now married. Her next two children Warren (would be 45) and Trixie (would be 42) are now deceased. Warren was a heavy drinker, his favorite drink being Thunderbird Wine. He drank so much of it his liver disintegrated. He died because of undetected internal bleeding. Trixie passed due to a Heroine overdose. She was an active prostitute here in Corona. She sold herself in order to feed her addiction. Her last child (other than the 7 month old deceased whose name was undisclosed) is named Paul. He is now in jail because having been on a heroine trip he brutally beat his mother, Mary, and put her in the hospital. When he was arrested he told police that he was God and his mother was Satan and that was the reason why he had beat her. Five months later she suffered a stroke followed by another 8 months later. It was calculated that she had only months to live; her children took everything she had and divided it amongst themselves. She did not pass away and is now recuperating from her loss.
Mary use to live in Garden Grove. As has become quite evident, nearly all her children had addictions which degraded her home. They pillaged through her savings and possessions in order to fuel their addictions. In 1996 after her having been laid off she left them and moved to Corona. She now lives in a modest home near Centennial High School.
Mary is highly motivated and politically active. She corresponds with our senators on a regular basis. She has in the past also sent letters to ex President Clinton, Colin Powell, and Barbara Feinstein. She reads the newspaper every day to maintain herself well informed.
Mary is also a devout Christian and thanks “the Lord” for every opportunity she has been given in life. She resents none of her children nor her ex husband regardless of their past. She prays for them every night and says she still “loves them.”
I got the impression from Mary that she doesn’t often have someone who is willing to listen and absorb some of her wisdom. I was deeply touched by her story and inspired by her truly benevolent and forgiving attitude as well as her strength through all of her endeavors. I was thoroughly impressed.
Nov 11 2005
-________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Mike Nevon
Mike Nevon
Male
Age:54
Mr. Novel has been homeless for 12 years and on the streets for over 25 years. He is a Marijuana and speed abuser as well as an alcoholic.
Originally on the streets because of a girlfriend he was with. Supposedly lived with her and after a fight (they fought a lot “she was a ho.”) he just one day up and left. Before he was homeless and unemployed he worked building campers. He now lives under a bridge whose location he did not wish to disclose.
When asked about his family his initial response was “Not anymore.”
After some pressing I got him to admit he had three kids. He has two daughters and one son. The youngest being his daughter Gina 32 years old. His second oldest, Linda, of 35 years of age, was who he spoke most about. She apparently moved out to Florida with her Hawaiian boyfriend as they both skipped parole. She now is back in California living on the streets. His oldest, a son named Carlos, is now relatively leading a stable life. He is the only one he has not severed ties with completely.
When I asked Mike what his average day consisted of his response was simple: “Yell at people and loiter.” Mike is agnostic. Seems to be bit confused about religion. Believes in afterlife where everything is much like our current world with one exception: no suffering.
Mike had a lot of things to speak about other than himself. It seems he’s quite ashamed about who he is and tends to change the subject quickly as I neared anything too personally revealing about him. His means of distracting my attention were quite interesting. At one point he mentioned that George W. Bush is a lot like Adolf Hitler and later mentioned his theory of Al Quaeda using homeless people as means of infiltrating our society to commit further terrorist acts. I suppose he gets a lot of time to think.
I was touched to meet Mike. I was leaving work after having picked up my paycheck when he came up to me and asked if I had any spare change. I didn’t but offered him a meal in exchange for some of his time and his cooperation. It was depressing to see him eat those French fries with such haste. I dare not imagine how long it has been since he last ate. Over in all though, Mike was very courteous and helpful.
Nov 11 2005
_______
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Male
Age:54
Mr. Novel has been homeless for 12 years and on the streets for over 25 years. He is a Marijuana and speed abuser as well as an alcoholic.
Originally on the streets because of a girlfriend he was with. Supposedly lived with her and after a fight (they fought a lot “she was a ho.”) he just one day up and left. Before he was homeless and unemployed he worked building campers. He now lives under a bridge whose location he did not wish to disclose.
When asked about his family his initial response was “Not anymore.”
After some pressing I got him to admit he had three kids. He has two daughters and one son. The youngest being his daughter Gina 32 years old. His second oldest, Linda, of 35 years of age, was who he spoke most about. She apparently moved out to Florida with her Hawaiian boyfriend as they both skipped parole. She now is back in California living on the streets. His oldest, a son named Carlos, is now relatively leading a stable life. He is the only one he has not severed ties with completely.
When I asked Mike what his average day consisted of his response was simple: “Yell at people and loiter.” Mike is agnostic. Seems to be bit confused about religion. Believes in afterlife where everything is much like our current world with one exception: no suffering.
Mike had a lot of things to speak about other than himself. It seems he’s quite ashamed about who he is and tends to change the subject quickly as I neared anything too personally revealing about him. His means of distracting my attention were quite interesting. At one point he mentioned that George W. Bush is a lot like Adolf Hitler and later mentioned his theory of Al Quaeda using homeless people as means of infiltrating our society to commit further terrorist acts. I suppose he gets a lot of time to think.
I was touched to meet Mike. I was leaving work after having picked up my paycheck when he came up to me and asked if I had any spare change. I didn’t but offered him a meal in exchange for some of his time and his cooperation. It was depressing to see him eat those French fries with such haste. I dare not imagine how long it has been since he last ate. Over in all though, Mike was very courteous and helpful.
Nov 11 2005
_______
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Homeless
How do you feel when a homeless person encounters you and ask for "some spare change"?
How do you react? What thought's cross your mind?
Overall, I feel compassion and curiosity. Yes. Curiosity.
How did these people end up where they are? What are they doing to try and rebuild their lives? Where are their families? If they went missing- would any one notice? Care?
As for the compassion; if I had the extra change I would give it to them. But I rarely do. Instead I've opted to offer to buy them a meal and in exchange I ask only they help me to better understand their situations and thus quench that curiosity.
Today I began. I conducted two interviews. I'll be posting these interviews and any others I conduct.
Nov 10 2005
_____________
*** Copied from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
How do you react? What thought's cross your mind?
Overall, I feel compassion and curiosity. Yes. Curiosity.
How did these people end up where they are? What are they doing to try and rebuild their lives? Where are their families? If they went missing- would any one notice? Care?
As for the compassion; if I had the extra change I would give it to them. But I rarely do. Instead I've opted to offer to buy them a meal and in exchange I ask only they help me to better understand their situations and thus quench that curiosity.
Today I began. I conducted two interviews. I'll be posting these interviews and any others I conduct.
Nov 10 2005
_____________
*** Copied from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com
Compassion
"A wretched soul, bruised with adversity,
We bid be quiet when we hear it cry;
But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
As much or more we should ourselves complain."
William Shakespeare
_________
***Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com.
We bid be quiet when we hear it cry;
But were we burdened with like weight of pain,
As much or more we should ourselves complain."
William Shakespeare
_________
***Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com.
Religion
Religion is beautiful.
For the longest time I haven't allowed myself to believe in God. I've wanted to take credit for every one of my accomplishments; I've wanted to owe nothing to anyone and everything to myself. I've revolted against the thought of something 'divine,' something with power over everything, using that power to ease my path in life. I've been selfish and arrogant.
There are things I can not find an explanation for; there are explanations for things which I cannot accept. Mainly, I cannot perceive our universe as a product of a 'big bang.' I can’t be as simple as that. Nor can I believe that humans, as complicated as we are, as evil as we seem, as benevolent as we can be, have been, and will be, as intelligent yet foolish, strong and at the same time weak, have come to be by mere chance.
Religion is beautiful because it is pure, it is selfless, it is honorable, devote, and admirable. Pure because it symbolizes untainted faith, selfless because it requires nothing but faith, honorable because faith can disgrace no one, devote because it doesn't disappoint those who have faith, and admirable because it is something I have been unable to attain.
I'm certain there is some sort of God, divinity or greater concept for me to discover, but I'm still uncertain whether everything in this world is owed to it. I read a lot, and for the most part it has been in search of what God means to me. I was raised Catholic, but I no longer consider myself to be Catholic. I'm not sure if I even believe in Jesus, or The Bible, or anything. For now all I know is that I need to find something to believe in.
For me to find God will be difficult. But if and when I do, I think it will prove even harder for me to accept him.
________________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com.
For the longest time I haven't allowed myself to believe in God. I've wanted to take credit for every one of my accomplishments; I've wanted to owe nothing to anyone and everything to myself. I've revolted against the thought of something 'divine,' something with power over everything, using that power to ease my path in life. I've been selfish and arrogant.
There are things I can not find an explanation for; there are explanations for things which I cannot accept. Mainly, I cannot perceive our universe as a product of a 'big bang.' I can’t be as simple as that. Nor can I believe that humans, as complicated as we are, as evil as we seem, as benevolent as we can be, have been, and will be, as intelligent yet foolish, strong and at the same time weak, have come to be by mere chance.
Religion is beautiful because it is pure, it is selfless, it is honorable, devote, and admirable. Pure because it symbolizes untainted faith, selfless because it requires nothing but faith, honorable because faith can disgrace no one, devote because it doesn't disappoint those who have faith, and admirable because it is something I have been unable to attain.
I'm certain there is some sort of God, divinity or greater concept for me to discover, but I'm still uncertain whether everything in this world is owed to it. I read a lot, and for the most part it has been in search of what God means to me. I was raised Catholic, but I no longer consider myself to be Catholic. I'm not sure if I even believe in Jesus, or The Bible, or anything. For now all I know is that I need to find something to believe in.
For me to find God will be difficult. But if and when I do, I think it will prove even harder for me to accept him.
________________
*** Copied over from my old blog reneruizj.blogspot.com.
Genesis
So here is where I begin.
I had an old Blog, reneruizj.blogspot.com, but it slowly died away. I wasn't giving myself the time or in any way convincing myself that it mattered. But since I made the decision to create this new blog I realized that if I don't want the same thing to happen wit this Blog I need to find good reasons and means of convincing myself to keep it running. Here goes...
1. I'm not currently attending school. I always thought of myself as a good writer and I'm finding that I'm loosing a lot of my creativity. I read a lot, which is good, but I have to write as well to continue the preserve or even expand my understanding of rhetoric.
2. We all age. We all forget. Although I'm not under the perception that as I age I will begin to forget what experiences have molded me into who I am today or will be in the future, I do realize that their memory may slowly blur with age. Therefore, it is reasonable to think that a good option is to record my thoughts today so that they remain intact for my review in the future.
3. For my own better understanding. I have learned that by writing things down and reviewing them I can achieve a better and deeper understanding of the motives behind my opinions.
4. For others. So that certain people, mainly friends and family, can have a better understanding of me. Also, if applicable, so that same friends and family can learn from my mistakes- which I plan on amply discussing in this Blog.
5. For my better health. Writing for me is like venting. It helps me relieve stress.
Here goes...
I had an old Blog, reneruizj.blogspot.com, but it slowly died away. I wasn't giving myself the time or in any way convincing myself that it mattered. But since I made the decision to create this new blog I realized that if I don't want the same thing to happen wit this Blog I need to find good reasons and means of convincing myself to keep it running. Here goes...
1. I'm not currently attending school. I always thought of myself as a good writer and I'm finding that I'm loosing a lot of my creativity. I read a lot, which is good, but I have to write as well to continue the preserve or even expand my understanding of rhetoric.
2. We all age. We all forget. Although I'm not under the perception that as I age I will begin to forget what experiences have molded me into who I am today or will be in the future, I do realize that their memory may slowly blur with age. Therefore, it is reasonable to think that a good option is to record my thoughts today so that they remain intact for my review in the future.
3. For my own better understanding. I have learned that by writing things down and reviewing them I can achieve a better and deeper understanding of the motives behind my opinions.
4. For others. So that certain people, mainly friends and family, can have a better understanding of me. Also, if applicable, so that same friends and family can learn from my mistakes- which I plan on amply discussing in this Blog.
5. For my better health. Writing for me is like venting. It helps me relieve stress.
Here goes...
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